Santa's Helper
by XxGoddess AthenaxX
Summary: He could understand the fat man in the red suit breaking into their house. He didn't like it but he understood that humans had weird traditions. What he didnt accept was those ridiculous outfits she had put his children in! He would not stand for it! *Christmas fic* fluff and Lemons


Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters within.

Warning: Lemon ahead. Turn back now if pwp isn't your thing

-x-x-x-

That blasted woman had finally done it this time.

He had learnt how to deal with her incessant chatter. All he really had to do was ignore the woman and continue with his training. Over the years he had learnt that it was best to let her talk and for him to grunt every now and then to make her happy. She was another species and he was certain that for all his genius, that even if they had a thousand years together he would never understand what went on in that brain of hers. But she had married him and that meant that he had to at least pretend to listen if he wanted to avoid her agonising rants when he didn't.

He had been sceptical when she had told him of the fat man in red sweats flying on horse-like creatures. Napa was rather bulky as was Majin Boo and both of them could fly so why this man needed assistance was baffling to him. Also, why the fat man had to be in such eye catching red when he was breaking into homes he had no idea.

What honestly bothered him was that this man ate their cookies and drank their milk and left presents for their children. Was he a thief? Was he a pedophile? What was his true purpose? He was already breaking in, but to steal their food was a bit much. And the presents… Vegeta was not at all comfortable with this pedophile leaving his impressionable spawn presents after robbing them of food and nourishment. What kind of sicko did that? And more importantly, why would that woman knowingly allow this? Vegeta had been told that breaking and entering and theft was illegal on Earth so why was this overlooked?

He didn't quite understand the purpose of this holiday but he went along with what that woman said lest he be subjected to one of her lectures.

But what honestly pissed him off was that that infernal woman had dressed their offspring in those ridiculous green outfits. Were they from the Planet Namek? No! They were Saiyans for heaven sake! They were the children of Vegeta, the Prince of all Saiyans and that blasted woman was damn well mocking him! He didn't care that she called them elves. What in the blazes was an elf anyway?

Vegeta nodded to himself at the only logical thought that he could fathom in his upset. Picking up the woman and throwing her over his shoulder, he ignored her protests. Turning to his eldest progeny, Vegeta eyed all of that green.

"Son," he addressed Trunks. "If you burn those revolting green outfits, I will spend all day tomorrow with you at the park."

Knowing that before he made it out of the room that his son was doing his bidding, Vegeta continued on his was to his training room with the squawking bundle on his shoulder throwing a fit. With each step, he was certain to bounce her just to get her blood pressure up to the same level she had driven his.

Using the voice command that the woman had programmed, he locked them into the training room before he dropped her into an undignified heap on the ground. Her indignant yelp did nothing to soothe his irritation at her own green outfit that barely covered her bosom. Before she knew whether up was down, Vegeta had her flat on her back on the cool floor.

"What do you think you're doing damn it Vegeta!?" Bulma yelled at him.

"Silence Woman!" he snapped at her. "You deserve punishment for your heinous crimes!"

"Huh?" In an instant her anger morphed into confusion.

"I understand the fat man. I don't like him but I get that you humans have ridiculous traditions. I can accept that. I don't like that you want this pedophile to give our spawn gifts but I suppose that I can always find him and kill him if he tries anything untoward."

Vegeta ripped her dress from the white fluff at the bottom to the top of the green silky fabric until it was torn in half. Bulma tried to stop him but he was stronger and more determined than she was.

"I however do not accept this mockery you have stuffed yourself and my progeny into."

"This is designer!"

In response, Vegeta tore more of it off her body. He yanked off those damn boots that went all the way up her long legs and flung them far away. And then he ripped apart those strings that she called lingerie much to her dismay.

"That was expensive!" Bulma batted at his hands only to have him yank them over her head.

"I see that you still haven't begun to understand the insult you call upon my blood."

"Wha-"

Before Bulma could even process, Vegeta had her on her knees with her hands still trapped in one of his own. He sent a swift smack to her bottom, careful not to use too much strength on his fragile human. The squeak that she let out sent a shiver of satisfaction through him. Confident that his woman knew the rules and would speak up if she was unhappy with anything; Vegeta sent another smack to her bottom. With each impact, Bulma let out a squeak that was equal parts shock and excitement.

Vegeta smirked at the sight of her pink flesh beneath is palm. The flesh between her thighs was dripping with her juices. "Do you understand what you have done woman?"

"It was just an outfit damn it!" she snapped at him. "The kids look cute in it and I look damn sexy!"

Shaking his head, Vegeta knew that the only way to get her to be agreeable was to stop that overworked brain of hers. Catching his glove between his teeth, he pulled it off before rubbing her tender flesh. Bulma whimpered as he got closer and closer to her dripping flesh.

"That ridiculous nonsense will not happen again."

Bulma took a moment to squeeze her eyes shut and think about what her husband was talking about. It had taken her weeks to have those outfits made. She thought they looked so damn adorable on her babies.

"I think that they're cute."

Disappointed at her answer, Vegeta traced the seam of her opening before pushing two fingers in. Bulma's moan was candy to his ears. For all of the years that he had dealt with this infernal woman, that was one of his favourite sounds coming from her lips.

"Wrong answer Woman."

Starting off at a slow and torturous pace, he coaxed more of those sounds from her lips. He enjoyed coaxing each whimper, moan, squeak and gasp almost as much as he liked a good fight. Picking up the pace that he moved at, Vegeta reduced Bulma to pants and whimpers, begging him for more. He knew that she wanted him send her over the edge but this was punishment and Vegeta did so enjoy punishing her. Each time she got close to the edge, he would slow down abruptly and build her back up again.

"Vegeta…" she begged. "I need… I need…more…"

It took him no time at all to rid himself of his clothes. Bulma didn't even make it up to her elbows before Vegeta slammed home.

The yelp that Bulma let out from the suddenness of it all had Vegeta pausing to make sure that his woman was alright. The squeeze of her around him and the wetness that followed told him that his lover had not only made it off the cliff but she was freefalling into the next world. Her entire upper body was plastered to the floor while she breathed heavily, trying to catch her breath after his sudden entrance. Certain that she was not in any pain; he gripped her hips and withdrew slowly. He pulled all the way out before slamming back in causing her to whimper, still riding her climax.

"Have you begun to understand Woman?" he asked.

He was hitting home with each thrust and Bulma didn't stand a chance of forming a coherent thought. She sent her palm flying out to give her some sort of leverage as Vegeta continued his assault. She groaned with each slow withdrawal and squeaked every time he found that spot that had her seeing stars.

Vegeta felt her flesh tighten around him and heard that hitch in her voice that told him she was at that agreeable point where she would do anything as long as he delivered. "Do you agree to never do it again?"

"Yes! Yes! YES! Damn it Vegeta just finish-"

Bulma tightened around him so suddenly that Vegeta was seeing stars as he emptied into her.

There was nothing in the universe that could compare to this feeling. Vegeta had travelled through space, fought countless battles and in the end nothing made him feel more victorious than this woman. With her incessant chatter and constant nagging, he wanted to kill her more often than not but then she did something to set off his temper and the next thing he knew, they were fucking like bunnies and the rush that he got was better than the high of battle. He would never admit it, but the Prince of Saiyans loved his human more than he loved fighting.

Well aware that his weight was more that her tiny human body could handle, Vegeta rolled them to their sides, careful not to dislodge their connection. He tucked his bicep under her head and pulled her body to him until there was no space between them. He wasn't a cuddler but she was and she was always in a better mood when he let her have these moments. Truthfully, he liked them too but he would never cop to it under torture.

"You ruined my outfit," Bulma mumbled.

"And you agreed never to wear something so ridiculous again."

She tried to elbow him but he pinned her arm against her body. "Brute."

Vegeta grunted acceptance to her claim. He felt the soft kiss she pressed to his bicep. It was those tiny moments that softened him up and made him more willing to give her those tender moments that she enjoyed so.

"Maybe next year I'll be Santa's Helper. I'll get myself a red outfit and the kids can be reindeer."

And then she ruined it all by speaking.

With a sigh at her words, Vegeta yanked his arm out from under her. He really was going to have to teach her this lesson all over again.

-x-x-x-

AN: I hope you all enjoyed this. I had no idea that I would end up writing and putting up something two hours ago. Let me know your thoughts :)


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